Hotline & Soup Supper…
Just finished my first all-nighter with the hotline phone from the Shelter and I didn’t sleep a wink. No the phone didn’t ring, which is a good thing, but just the thought that it might kept me from dropping off into blissful rest. Although it is normal, I didn’t think I would act this way. Answering the phone at the Shelter is completely different than having it next to your bed. I asked my husband to come get me should it ring while I was in the shower and he quickly responded, “take in there with you!” I had to laugh cause he was feeling the same way I was, nervous that it should ring and be an emergency. Now don’t get me wrong, I have all the training, know all the rules, have all the contact numbers and reference materials in a big back pack that comes with the phone, but I just couldn’t help the feeling of its presence, looming over my shoulder, ready to jump. I actually found myself chanting to it, “please don’t ring…please don’t ring,” and felt like a wimp for doing so.
Thankfully, the Soup Supper fund raiser was this evening and I was able to bring it along, hidden safely in my coat pocket. A great sense of comfort came over me being surrounded by all the volunteers, staff and board of directors who were working the event and I finally relaxed. Our volunteer coordinator approached me immediately to ask if I was alright, knowing it was my first overnighter, and I gushed out all of my fears even though there had been no calls. What a great system, I thought, that everyone listens and cares so attentively…and no one thought I was a wimp! I learned alot about my community and felt I belonged.
Peace and blessings to all… And go volunteer. Cause even if the phone doesn’t ring, and you weren’t able to place someone in a safe house or offer some kind of help, you’ll be surprised at what YOU get out of it.
Dawn
March 1st, 2005 at 3:38 pm
I work at 2 different shelters, one for men and one for families. It is a hard job, frustrating yet satisfying all at once. There will be times the people you work with will not listen to you and will walk back in to danger and it will break your heart. Then there are times people will take all the help offered and succeed beyond your wildest expectations. It is a roller coaster sometimes, but always worth it, so don’t ever get discouraged. There is a sign on the wall of Shishu Bhavan, the children’s home in Calcutta which is run by Nun’s of Mother Theresa’s order, called “Anyway”. It will give you great strength and keep you grounded at the same time while doing this kind of work. If you don’t have it or have never read it, please let me know and I will e-mail it or post it here for all to read. You can find it in Mother Theresa’s book “A Simple Path” as well. As she said, “Take time to do charity, it is the key to heaven”. Indeed, and also the key to a very fulfilling life.
March 1st, 2005 at 4:42 pm
I always wanted to help out all i can.I donate all the clothes and toys that we no longer need to big brothers and the church.If you know where would be the first place to start to find out about helping out,i would really enjoy doing something like that.Once again your true person really came thru after all you’ve been thru,you are a real inspiration.serena
March 3rd, 2005 at 4:20 pm
Two great comments. Wonderful. Charlotte, I actually commented a couple days ago about the wonderful poem “Anyway” you refer to, but it got lost and I came down with the stomach flu and didn’t have the energy to rewrite at the time. I wanted to say that I LOVE that poem and in truth I actually carry a copy of it in my book bag that goes with me everywhere and share it, like you, when I get the opportunity. My intention has always been to post it on this blog under quotes and just haven’t gotten around to it yet. What better time than now, right? Thanks.
Serena,
Donations come in many ways, shapes and sizes. The fact that you donate items to charities is definitely helping others. But if you are feeling the urge to help out in other ways you should listen to that voice. There are a couple of things I do before I take a step towards volunteering. First, I pray on it. Really. I ask if this is the best thing for me to do. Usually, I am not struck with lightening bolts of revelations, but if I encounter no internal resistance, then I take the next step. If I question at all why I am stepping up to volunteer, I check myself and make sure that my intentions are for the right reasons. Once that is as clear as it can get, I try to figure out where I fit. For me the Domestic Violence shelter seemed the most logical. I had been there. But just because I have had the experience in the past, didn’t mean I was ready to tackle the hot line right away. I was very sensitive to other people’s pain and found myself in an emotional distress at first. So, I did other things. I answered office phones, solicited donations, sorted donations, helped with fund raisers, etc. You see, once I found an institution I was drawn to personally, there were many ways to offer help. The last thing is to commit your time and not over due, as I’m sure Charlotte can attest to.
There, I hope this has been helpful. Think about who you are and what motivates you, then follow through. One of the motto’s I live by applies very well to volunteering: “You can’t give it away unless you got it, and you can’t keep it unless you give it away.” Know who you are and what you can give, and be okay with that. Every measure, no matter how small, can move mountains.
Blessings,
Dawn
April 7th, 2005 at 12:48 pm
Dawn, Thank God your’s is the happy ending to the Wonderland story. I don’t know many people who make it back from where you did. I know much to much about those demons that come calling to you when the cocaine is over,when the ride is over. My story is sadly very much your story, I just sat in the driver seat , I was the abusive one, I was John. I have watched wonderland many many times.” Val Kilmer gave a academy award worthy performance” I live in the south and for more than two years now I have been off the “base” and trying to deal with the self loathing and the insecure feelings of how am I going to salvage any kind of normal life and move forward. I live by myself and rarely if ever do I go out into the real world. I am unable to this point to hold a job my bills are all paid by my mother who only wants to see me succeed in life. I feel I may never be able to, I feel so very different than anybody left around me. I don’t talk with people about what happened to me, about who I became in those lost years. I guess I am afraid if they truly knew the extent of just how ugly and pathetic of a person I was they wouldn’t be able to deal with it, like maybe they don’t really want to know. I lost the love of two very good women along the way down. One was a strong willed, educated, beautiful, woman who oddly enough was a nurse, she saw the writing on the walls early on and wasn’t going to have anything to do with it, so while she didn’t erase me completely from here life she watched from afar, the other was a young girl, far to young who had know way of knowing what she was in for. I wanted her because she was young and innocent, I suppose some part of me needed her innocence because mine was all but gone. No one who hasn’t been a coke smoking freak can truly know or understand just what a freak scene it is , the seedy sex is a bye product of that world and while I never made any movies to my knowledge but who knows, I did in one form or another sell my self I was a whore. I saw and was apart of the violence that is a sad part of the life. I found a good friend I’d known since high school dead on his floor with a gun in his hand, I suppose he saw it as his only way out because he was unable to deal with what he had become. that was about 6 years ago this summer I still have his little shitzu who I picked up on my way out the door. I love this little dog so much, I understand all to well when you talk about how brave little Thor was standing so small but so brave in the face of all the madness going on around him. In the last couple of years I’ve come to believe that God is real and that he has a plan for me, I’m starting to see the light at the end of the tunnel its still a long way away but it’s there for me I just have to get up and start moving towards it. If you were able to find the light and be happy then I know its possible for me. Dawn you are a remarkable woman who beat the odds.The fact that you are alive today and helping people is inspirational.
God Bless You Dawn,
Charles