I want to share some of the feedback I received from the teens who came to my presentations, “Our Throwaway Teens: Who Are They and How Can We Help?”  These comments are so important as they reflect a teen’s view on abuse and neglect today!

TEENS SAY

“I thought you did a nice job on your presentation. I must say I didn’t feel very affected by it simply because I know so many people already who are in abusive stiuations. However, I could tell that the adults around me were. It’s great that you are making this effort to spread awareness. We both know that an actual solution will be a horribly difficult thing to put into play. Keep up the good work ”

“Your presentation was powerful, however I do feel the statistics were way too low. Even as it was though, it provided a great amount of insight into the world of a throwaway teen. The only thing I can think of that would make it more powerful would be more firsthand accounts of your life or of others teens. I think it is wonderful that you took the hard life you’ve had and have turned it around so you can help others. Good luck!”

“It was a presentation filled with information that got you thinking and feeling about things you had not before. It gave so much information that I didn’t know and opened my eyes to the issues of throwaway teens.”

“The thing that struck me the most about the presentation was how many “throwaway” teens there are. It made me start thinking about other kids I know who might be going through those kind of things, and now I know why/how to sympathize and have extra compassion for those kids.“

“It was very informative and the visuals were good. I liked how you showed ways to help these teenagers and how easy it is to help.”

“I love the recordings, it brought the facts to life. I didn’t feel you were trying to pressure me to feel something. I just did.”

“I thought it was great. It was very emotional, yet very informational. I can really relate to lots of people and their own struggles.”

“Your presentation was very interesting. I enjoyed all that I learned from it and it reached my heart. Powerful, disturbing, informative.”

“It was an eyeopening experience to the realities of life and the stuff we don’t all see. It brought me to a completely different world and I learned so much. Good presentation.”

“Your presentation was really informative. It was also very emotional. I could tell how much of your emotions you put into it.”

“Your presentation was very moving. The images and dramatic readings gave the presentation a new dimension that allows for your listener to connect to the situations.”

“The presentation did a good job at shedding light on an unfortunately hidden problem.”

“Powerful, moving presentation… For those of us who lived it, I hope we can help to save others from going through the same.”

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THIS IS FROM THE AUTHOR OF ONE OF THE NARRATIVES I USED IN MY PRESENTATION. HE SAW HOW HIS STORY COULD HELP OTHERS.  HE IS AMAZING!

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“I really liked your presentation. It was close to me because I’ve gone through similar accounts. I thank you for using my essay.”

All my love and thanks for these comments and for coming to listen to such a hard topic.  Also, for being willing to see how you can possibly help.

Dawn

This may or may not be clear to people, but I have two birthdays. My bellybutton birthday on December 29th and another, July 22nd, the anniversary of the day that I got sober. It has been over a decade since I turned away from the need to numb out my emotions. What a journey so far!

I remember in the beginning the sheer agony of being in my own skin. Every reflection of me was like a million shards of “my” broken mirror slicing through my very soul. My wounded past was overpowering, and I was afraid to move. I was a walking, breathing bomb of fire…explosion…then ashes. A pile of rendered dust. Chaos surrounded me, threatened to suck me back. Fear was very angry.

Then Grace came. A tiny pin-point of light. Warm hands held mine softly in a circle and said “pray”. I took steps that measured nano-seconds, then seconds, then minutes, and hours…and I didn’t die. I began to have moments of clarity and peace, and I clung to them as my armor for when fear would try to return.

Grace continued to come. My prayers grew stronger, and I learned the word faith. The light, soft, pure, resilient, wrapped around me. Nonthreatening and tiny at first, it was stronger, more beautiful than I ever imagined…and the scary things slowly lost their shape and disappeared. I learned the word trust.

Grace remains. The events of my past haven’t changed. I have. I have turned the glass over, and it is more than half full. It is in fact, many times brimming over. In my wildest dreams I never thought I’d get to be part of a better day for others, but here I am. Today, I have happiness, purpose, joy and love in my life. I have learned that the light is God.

Medallion Press is airing a short interview I did with them last month at the Book Expo of America in New York.

Blog Talk Radio

Best,
Dawn

I found this on the side of my refrigerator. It has been there for about a year-and-a-half, written by my then almost 8-year-old daughter. She knows I have written this book. She knows it is about a real hard time with a man who hurt me, but she cannot comprehend the depth of cruelty that occurred and how humans are capable of inflicting terrible pain on one another.

Still, she will get older and with age have more exposure to an unfair life. With the passage of time, I hope she will see why I wrote this book. I hope she will see how my intention was to expose an ugly truth that is too often swept from sight, and passed off with excuses as okay. I hope she will see how I wrote this book with her in my heart, her mom’s story of pain and consequences, to protect her.

She cannot change who her mother is, and she does not need to take on my path. She has her own story, and I love her for drawing me this picture….

Dawn
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Click here for more information on my upcoming presentations.indexcfm

I finish my studies on Throwaway Teen Abuse Prevention. In the next few weeks I will be turning this into a power point presentation and putting it out to the public on June 10, 2009 at my local university to faculty, students and the public. Through a grant I received from our tribal foundation and sponsored by my local shelter, I am able to give my presentation at three venues. The second presentation will be at the local library in town and the third will be a the university’s  Writing 131 class during summer session.

As some of you know, I come to this topic because of my own story. I was a throwaway, a kid who grew up with violence and neglect at home. I was abandoned and left vulnerable as a teen, that in my case, made me “easy” to approach and seduce by John Holmes.

I don’t always understand why it doesn’t sound strange to people that a 32 year old porn star was seeking out the company of a 15 year old kid. He buddied up to my dad and sold him pot. My dad looked the other way. In truth, everyone looked the other way. Why?

As I conducted my research for this presentation, it truly sucked discovering how much of a statistic I was. Along with the overwhelming government statistics I found, I also uncovered terrible hidden narratives, short stories written anonymously in classrooms, that to me, more accurately represents the many unreported teens living today in painful and unfair circumstances. Knowing this also made me very aware that I was/am not the only one, and ignites my passion to raise awareness and educate communities to prevent and care for these throwaway teens.

Stay tuned please. The more I discover the more I want to share the hope.

Dawn

It’s high time to be posting something…anything! Right?

I’ll start with news of a committee that I sit on. The President’s Commission on the Status of Women, or PCSW. This is a committee based out of my local University, and every year during National Women’s Week the PCSW selects from a pool of outstanding women from the community, faculty, staff, and students. This is my second year serving here and there is always alot of work to get things organized, but everything finally came to fruition the first week of March. Kathleen Dahl won for outstanding faculty and Sharon Mendoza won for outstanding citizen. Professor Dahl had quite a history of being the odd woman out and standing strong, so her success as this year’s awardee was deserved. But Ms. Mendoza was the underdog, and won my heart.

It snows where I live in the Winter. Well, let’s be real. It snows Fall, Winter and half of Spring to be modest. At the corner of our town square, every Friday early evening a small handful of people stand waving a blue flag with the words “peace” sewn in white. The thing is, on many of the blustery, freezing, evenings there is only one person standing waving her flag for peace. It is Ms. Mendoza.

That image, the one of her standing with her flag in some of the most frigid weather in Eastern Oregon, was the face of courage and bravery to me. And as I closed my eyes to contemplate on the cast of deserving nominees, Ms. Mendoza’s lone figure wouldn’t leave my thoughts and I placed my vote.

It’s tough to pick an awardee out of a pool of very deserving women, but we (the committee) did good.
Dawn

MEDALLION PRESS LAUNCHES A NONFICTION LINE!
St. Charles, Illinois “August 1, 2008” Medallion Press, Inc., is pleased to announce the debut of a nonfiction line, with the first title available in stores August 2010. This new imprint will cover areas of motivation and strength, self-help, and autobiographies. This will be the seventh imprint for Medallion Press, adding it to the family of fiction imprints, including the new Medallion Masterpiece Collection, which will unveil its first title in November 2008.

The first release of our nonfiction line will be an autobiographical look at the life of Dawn Schiller, a woman who, as a teenager, became wrapped up in the bizarre life of legendary porn star John Holmes, and the drugs, beatings, and murders that soon consumed her world. In The Road through Wonderland, Dawn will give a recounting of her life, starting with her childhood, leading through her relationship with John Holmes, and through the struggle she encountered to overcome her past. In 2003, Lions Gate released the film Wonderland, a look at the life of John Holmes and his connection with the Wonderland Murders. Actor Val Kilmer, who played John, and actress Kate Bosworth, who played Dawn, will both contribute a foreword to the book.

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IMAGINE ALL THE PEOPLE…….

Today is John Lennon’s birthday…..

Today marks six weeks since my daughter’s surgery, she has been given the all clear by the doctors. We call this her recovery day.

Today I can announce the news that “The Road Through Wonderland” has found a publisher.

JUST IMAGINE….

Thank you all for keeping the faith,

Dawn

My latest DV Shelter event took place last night. I would like to share with you some of the wonderful people that gave of their time and talent. The event was an amazing success!

Jimmy Lloyd Rea – File photo
People who love the blues and a good cause are in for a rockin good time Saturday night when Shelter From the Storm hosts the second annual Jimmy Lloyd Rea Birthday Bash at the Eagles Lodge.
Not only does the 7 p.m. fundraiser coincide with Rea’s birthday, it also comes along at the start of October, Domestic Violence Awareness Month. Shelter board member and event organizer Dawn Schiller said it all fits together very nicely.
This is a wonderful way to launch the observance, and also to let the community know the shelter is available to everyone and working hard to eradicate violence, she said.
Proceeds from the event will benefit the agency, which is a domestic violence crisis intervention service. Rea and the local musicians siding him are donating their time and talent to the event. Jimmy is a staunch advocate against violence, and he shows it with his actions and his words, said Schiller.  That goes for all the musicians who will be there.
Rea, an ever-popular blues singer and bass guitarist,  has been playing the blues since the 1960s.
Though Rea is internationally known and has performed with legends like Pete Karnes, Muddy Waters and the group Canned Heat, he often plays small towns in the Northwest.
His father, county Judge Jimmy Lloyd Rea, often presided over cases involving domestic violence. That gave the son a chance to see the consequences of violence up close.
A lot of times, the cases were about parents beating and abusing their kids. I saw that it turned those kids sideways, Rea said. Its always driven me crazy. I cant stand that abuse stuff. This is my way of helping the people who need it.
Saturday night, Rea will appear with singer-guitarist Al Too Loud MacLeod, keyboardist Matt Cooper, guitarists Larry Robb and Jerry Smith, drummer Tim Erickson and saxophonist Greg Johnson.
Sit-in musicians will include Russell Hunt, Luke McKern, and Dave Yoder.
Hunt is a Navy veteran who played saxophone in the Navy Stage Band. He was once selected to play his instrument on the Tonight Show, but was unable to make it because of his service commitment.

Tickets for the benefit, priced at $10 per person and $15 for families, can be purchased at Shelter From the Storm.
We were a packed house last year, Schiller said. The Eagles were pleasantly surprised to find all their chairs filled with people.
The event is sponsored by Sorbenots Coffee, Dominos Pizza, Pizza Hut, New York Richies and Coca-Cola.

It is with the heaviest heart that I inform you that my webmaster, Gloria, passed away from complications brought on by cancer.

Gloria was strong to the end and, I believe, not planning on leaving us. For this reason, this website has been stagnant and had some technical difficulties. There has been a changing-of-the-guard, and this blog will remain up and running. There are even plans to improve.

It is hard posting here without Gloria’s keen eye and expertise watching my every move. She blocked the spam, intercepted the hurtful comments, and kept track of some craziness. She has left some awesome people behind to take her place, but no one can replace “our Gloria”. While going through some of the initial posts to this site, I found a comment to me from Gloria. It is as if she is speaking to me from where ever she is now. It reads:

“Great post, Dawn. You offered your readers a view of your world in a heartfelt and spontaneous way. Those moments of complete perfection are not always seen or felt, let alone expressed, even though they skirt the edge of what we think of as real and wait for that one moment of discovery. Beautiful is the word that comes into my mind that describes what you wrote. You showed what beauty looks, feels, and sounds like rather than trying to tell your readers what beauty is. This is a sign of a good writer, one who can give their readers an opportunity to have an experience without getting in their way by telling them what they should feel and think about an event and/or story. Showing the experience and allowing your reader to join you as it unfolds gives them a experiential peek into your world, whether it be today, yesterday, or tomorrows world.
Very well written. If this short piece is any indication of the writing style in your book, I can’t wait to read it. Glo “

Miss you Wildmind.

Dawn